I'm still young to talk about success or achievement, yet I wanna highlight the word 'goal/dream/wishlist' for this particular post. Frankly said, I wasn't that 'succeed' compared to my other freaking awesome friends. We cannot really be on the top, right? Sometimes, I feel like giving up if I can't really reach my goal but I always remind myself to always believe in myself. People may see me like lack of confidence or energy. I am but not almost the time, you can't see that through me. Let me share some other things you may misjudge me, seeing me studying for these rest years. One thing you really have to understand.
"Outcome is not important, effort is."
These words, I inject into my brain nerves every single time I put effort like crazy but didn't achieve that level. There're other popular pep talk people used to hang onto, maybe you're one of them.
"Hardwork will never betray you."
"Don't work hard but do work smart"
I don't really believe them, not saying 100% but more like 34%. I'm not sure about you, but me personally, my hardwork always betrays me. Ideally, those two pep talk are contradicting to one another. For some people, they just didn't turn out well. Working smart is really a good idea after all but people should also understand some people just don't know what 'working smart' really means or maybe they don't know where to start or maybe they got no one to help or maybe they're that kind who don't know how to start conversation just to ask what's exactly they need to plan for their study routine or other maybe's'. These people are existed in this world, not because they don't wanna succeed, it's because they don't know how to start. Well, we can simply say, 'if you don't know then learn'. Yes, people. They're learning but the way they're learning might be slightly different from you. To catch pace with you, all they can do is putting a damn hard effort. It's just sometimes didn't turn out well because that way may be not smart enough. It might be true but have know how those teach those people to appreciate their own effort and self even better?
We're only young students, not many of us can manage time wisely, plan good strategies. Those people who can do all of these, God blessed them. I'm sure they already succeeded and achieve what they want, I'm happy for you guys of course. Majority didn't, need understand their situation; one may think that he already work smart but still didn't get an overwhelming result, one may put effort like an insane but still can't achieve the target, and other lucky people, who are gifted and don't really have to struggle but still get damn good results. You know yourself that well, only you. Which type are you doesn't really matter, the reason why, how hard you strive are all that matters.
If you are really a good student, all you do is 'smart work'. Of course you won't study the same topics until the exact exam day. You're a doing a stupid work if you did. No, right. It's just sometimes a last minute study (really not a good habit) but you did put effort on that 'last minute' what. *Pat on your back* As long as you did your very best, you really did well dear. People always say it's okay to fail, then you'll learn something but me, still afraid of failing. I afraid if I will regret. I have that one fear by the time I sit in my exam hall seeing the questions and be like 'oh man, I didn't cover on this topic'. That's what I'll regret. I hate those feelings. Therefore, I always put effort on every single exam. Yet, sometimes I still cannot do my best and somehow can't really achieve my target. It was sad, feeling like giving up yeah but after all it taught you to be stronger. Keeping my mind that it's really okay to take some time crying, regretting but don't take to long. Stand up then and try harder. Sometimes, you didn't make it not because you don't deserve to. It's because Allah wants to see you strive even harder, you didn't do enough. Don't feel down, just embrace it. You're worth trying for, studying lillahitaala.
*sharing session*
During my PMR days, I always shed tears and felt down for some reasons but I cheered myself up by listening to this song and its lyrics. It was so comforting, giving me so-called positive vibes. I owed U-Kiss for this, would love to share with you people. I don't know why but I'll get recharged every single time I listen to this track, even now. Do check it out.
P.S: Everyone deserves to win/succeed, there's no one were born to fail. Believe in yourself and love yourself.
Kiss, Kikira.
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